Why You Shouldn’t Care About Life Lessons

study babyI received an email from a fellow spiritual teacher in which she talked about “lessons”.  You’ve probably heard something about lessons all your life–you have to learn your lessons, you came into this life to learn certain lessons and you’ll keep being challenged until you learn the lesson.

Bullshit.

Pardon my profanity, but I never like using the word “lessons”.  The word “lesson” contains implicit reference to your ability to pass or fail.  And that’s just not how it works.

The Universe is logical.  There is no pass or fail, no right or wrong way to live your life.  There is only what you like and what you don’t like.

Yes, you learn, but not because anyone is keeping score and not because you might fail and mess up and fall down and never get it right.  You don’t have to get it right.  Your mission is to live in the way that you like.

Yes, there are consequences to actions, thoughts, and feelings.  What you get to learn is which actions, thoughts, and feelings bring the consequences you like, instead of the ones you don’t like.

Yes, it can be a little tricky.  But you have plenty of cosmic help and support.  Instead of “lessons”, think of “messages”.  Messages come at you all the time.  This is the word I prefer to “lessons”.  If you think of “messages” being provided to you through the consequences you are experiencing, you can figure out which messages lead you to the consequences you like.

Pay attention!  Thoughts that pop into your head, conversations you overhear, something that gets your attention on the radio, experiences that happen to you, and eventually your own body… all of these contain messages that are intended to guide you toward what you like.

Pay attention!

“Do You See Dead People All the Time?”

Test-3_sm_t“How did you know you were psychic?”  I get asked that a lot, and I always think it’s kind of funny, because isn’t it a self-answering question?  But the truth is that I actually did not know I was psychic for a long time.  I did, but I didn’t.  Let me explain.

I don’t see dead people all the time.  But, if I pay attention, I can feel spirits around me most of the time.  You see, I spent most of my life ignoring my gifts.  When I was a child, and I told my mom that I felt like I was being watched, that I had a feeling that other, unseen people were in my room, she praised my “wonderful imagination.”

I’m glad she treated it that way, instead of condemning it, but it never occurred to me that I was gifted in any way.  I grew up believing that all creative people felt “unseens” around them, and frequently had pictures of unfamiliar faces pop into their heads.  It wasn’t until I was in my early 40’s that I figured out what that was!

I also had spontaneous out-of-body experiences starting when I was in my early teens.  It wasn’t until I read that famous medium John Edward had the same experience that I understood it foretold my gifts as a psychic.

I’ve had some very bold premonitions, like those of my husband’s death and September 11, but, except when I am doing readings, most of my days are probably a lot like most of yours.  Maybe I’m more accustomed to receiving “messages from the Cosmos,” but it doesn’t mean you aren’t getting them aimed at your head too!

If I pay attention, I can tune into almost anything I want.  I’ve learned to “home in” or “tune the radio” and pick up the signals.  I can look at a stranger–or think about one–and I’ll “see” his/her energy, any health problems in the body, past and future events, and/or spirits of his/her late loved ones.

This is how I work over the phone–I just tune into the person I am reading for.  If you ever see me working live, you’ll notice me looking at the floor or a blank wall.  This is so I can better “see” what’s in my mind’s eye without the distractions of faces and pictures.

I do almost always feel energies around me.  Especially over my right shoulder.  This is a guide or a group of energies that follow and steer me.  And it’s quite comfortable for me to have that feeling.

Did I answer the self-answering question?  What else do you want to know about walking around every day in the Psychic’s Pshoes?

Are you in the Garden of Eden?

We all start out in the Garden of Eden.  We know we are fully loved without condition and that all our needs are met before we even recognize them.

Do you think the baby comes out of the womb asking, “Did I do all right?  Do I get a good grade?  Does my hair look good?  Does my mom love me?”  Of course not.  Infants have just experienced nine months of having every need met instantaneously.  It doesn’t occur to them that this trend won’t continue.

After being born, we know instinctively to cry when we have a need, and that need is usually met pretty quickly, since a baby crying is annoying and, to its mother, unbearable.  We have come from unconditional love and we KNOW it, we have a full knowing of it, without doubt.

Then, one day, Mommy has to say “NO.”  She has to stop you from touching the stove or pulling the TV over on your head.  And that feels like NOT LOVE.  So we start trying to please her in an effort to get back to LOVE, back to the Garden.

We start making our beds and good grades, singing if  we can sing, being funny if we can be funny, smiling if we’re good at smiling.  We seek approval because it’s the only thing we can figure out how to get.  It only works sometimes, but it feels pretty good when we can get it.

And that’s the paradox:  You can’t earn unconditional love.  You can only earn approval, which is a pale shadow of unconditional love.  But we keep trying, because in the back of our heart, we remember unconditional love and we want it.  We want it bad.

Here’s the secret:  You’re still in the Garden.  You never really left; it’s an illusion that you have to earn someone’s approval.  You are MADE of unconditional love!  Your soul is a piece of it, and you carry it around in this vessel you call a body.  All you have to do is REMEMBER and FEEL. 

Can you feel it?  Have you ever felt like you’re back in the Garden?  Close your eyes and feel it.  It is within you now and forever.

Are You Psychic?

psychic%201(Originally published April 30, 2009)

I recently had a conversation with a woman named Janie who wondered if she is psychic. She told me that she often knows who is calling her phone before she answers it, believes she can tell what her dog is thinking, and finds that she is intuitive about numerous other things. Most people wonder at one time or another if there is something more to their “I knew who was calling” thing than meets the Third Eye.

There is good reason to wonder if we might posses a little bit of that sixth sense because–surprise!–we all do. We all have some intuitive ability. It is a built-in part of our psyche that works with our logic and our base instincts to help us figure out what’s what. Unfortunately, the intuition has been lost in a logical and practical world. We are taught to use logic and critical thinking in school, but if we cannot explain where we got an answer, well…we must be cheating!

Intuition has gotten away from our understanding, but like the appendix and the tailbone, it’s still there, whether you know what it’s for or not! Albert Einstein once said, “The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.”

Well-spake, Dr. Einstein!

But enough of my dismay with the current state of our collective understanding. The question remains, “Are you psychic?” And the simple answer is, “Yes!”

That doesn’t necessarily mean that Janie (or you) should hang out a neon hand and set up shop as a palm reader, but it does mean that people know much more than they think they know. We all have energetic access to all the information ever known or thought. Wow!

If you are interested in developing your natural intuitive abilities, first, forget the notion that something which catches your attention is only your imagination. When I was a little girl and told my mom that I felt like someone was watching me and that it felt like people were around me, she told me I had a wonderful imagination. While I am grateful she did not condemn me for it, it took me decades to figure out that there were spirits communicating with me from the Other Side!  Try thinking that if something means something TO YOU, then it MEANS something to you.  Got it?

Once you grasp this concept, take notice when your hunches are right. If you knew who was calling on the phone before you answered, pat yourself on the back and say, “Wow, I really DO have intuition!”  Paying attention to these occurrences will increase their frequency in your awareness. Keep it up!

We are given both gifts of intuition and intellect, and we are at our best when we use them both. Try it–you just might discover that you are psychic after all!

If you are so inclined, feel free to post in the comments your experience with your intuition.

Should Healing Be Free?

From Pamela Bruner of Make Your Success Easy
www.MakeYourSuccessEasy.com
888-736-0620
pamela@makeyoursuccesseasy.com

Should Healing Be Free?

I received an email this week from one of my subscribers, saying that he wouldn’t participate in a very low-priced tapping offering because the people that he worked with (people with addictions, depression, etc) couldn’t afford it. He also said that the spirit of EFT was to be given away, not sold.

I hear this frequently from healers. There are some who believe that healing should be given away, and that to make money, especially to make more money than you need for subsistence living, is just wrong if you’re a healer. I disagree with this, and here’s why.

1) Just because some people can’t afford something doesn’t mean that it should be given away free to all. Some people can’t afford to shop at Walmart. Should Walmart give away their wares? I’m not arguing against charity – I believe strongly in giving back. I believe that businesses have a responsibility to charge for the transformation that they provide, and then give back in some way as well. But if you give it all away, you’re broke, out of business, and have NOTHING to give back. Jack Canfield taught me ‘When you’re poor, the good that you can do is limited to your physical presence.’ Jack taught me how to write multi-thousand dollar checks to charity. Wouldn’t you like to have more reach?

2) People value what they pay for. Period. I’ve seen it over and over again. Free resources go unused, dismissed, and de-valued – no matter how valuable – just because they are free. Giving tastes of what you do for free is great – it allows people to sample, experiment and lower their risk before they invest with you. EVERY wealthy EFTer I know, and unfortunately there aren’t many, gives away free support in some form. But giving everything away – or underpricing it – means that the transformation you provide will in many cases be ignored. And that’s a real shame. (It also creates an attitude of entitlement, which is currently rampant in the world and further disempowers people.)

3) You have to take care of yourself to do your work well. It may be true in healing that the work comes through you, not by you, and that you’re acting as a channel for Spirit. But if you’re constantly overworked, stressed about money, or not practicing good self-care because you don’t have the time or the resources, you’re not an effective healer/coach/practitioner. You do actually need to live well, take time off, eat good food, etc, in order to do your best work – the work that truly serves your clients and the world.

4) If you’re a healer, and you’re broke, it’s probably not because you’re chock-full of clients and not charging enough. It’s because you don’t have enough clients, which means you’re not helping as many people as you could. In order to truly help people, you need to get out, market yourself, grow your business, talk to people, be confident in what you do, and so much more. This takes time, energy, and yes – money. To do good, it takes cash. It’s been said ‘It took millions to keep Mother Teresa poor.’ She was constantly attracting money, although she didn’t choose to keep it for herself. Is your system working that well?

5) Poverty is not a status-symbol. Humans all have a need for status (this is a psychological fact.) There is always something that you are better at than someone else, and something that others are better at than you. Too many healers are claiming poverty as a status symbol, i.e. ‘I’m a better person because I’m not rich, in fact I’m barely scraping by.’ I’ll admit that I used to hold this mistaken, disempowering belief back when I was a musician. Because I couldn’t make that much money, I would denigrate those who did. It was petty. It’s not noble to be poor. Look for another way to feel good about yourself, rather than poverty.

If you want to be poor, you can. If you want to make more money, you can do that as well. Be aware that it’s a choice, and empower yourself by honoring both the choice that works for you, and the choice made by those who want to do more good in the world by becoming wealthy, and sharing their gifts.

The Dark Side of the Law of Attraction

“Why Did I Attract THIS?”

That’s the question we all need to ask all the time. Many people have seen “The Secret” and have been studying the Law of Attraction, so they’re starting to be conversant in some of its principles.

In my practice as a psychic medium and medical intuitive, I’ve noticed that my clients don’t get the whole picture of just what this attraction thing is.

Simply stated, the Law of Attraction is a law of physics that applies to your life in that what you put your attention on is naturally drawn to you. Most people look at this law thus: “How can I attract more money/love/etc.?”

And that is great. That is the best use of the Law of Attraction and if you are consistently attracting things, people, relationships, and experiences that please you, I congratulate you!  That is fantastic!

Unfortunately, that is not the case for about 99% of us out there. Most of us continue to attract at least a few things that we’re not too crazy about and here’s the kicker:  NOBODY KNOWS THEY’RE DOING IT.

By focusing our attention on things, experiences, relationships, and feelings–that we like or do not like–we attract them into our lives.

You read that right:  THAT WE LIKE OR DO NOT LIKE. Everything in your life right now, like it or not, has been attracted to you BY YOU. Ta-dum! You are the author of your own life, so I hope it’s a book you really enjoy reading.

A while back, within one week, I talked to three clients who were actually offended when I suggested that they had attracted experiences into their life that they didn’t like. “Why would I attract THAT?” they demanded. “I don’t want THAT, it’s BAD.”

Right, I get that. I understand that you don’t consciously want car trouble, health problems, bad grades, bad breath, or whatever. Who would?

And that’s exactly why you need to ask, “Why did I attract THIS?” Anything that gets your attention for better or worse, ask the question.

Here’s a dire example. My husband died suddenly several years ago and left me with two small children to raise and very little life insurance. Why did I attract THAT?

Why indeed.  I may never know all the reasons, but I know there are some, probably many.  You know what I always say–everything happens not for A reason, but for many reasons.

And with some of these larger things (and maybe the small things too), rest assured that, at some point before your birth, your spirit got together with other spirits to plan some of the important events you wanted in your lives as humans.

This is why we sometimes have trouble understanding-we don’t communicate with our own spirits very well. It’s why we attract both things we like and things we don’t.

The good news is that, once you recognize that your thoughts and energy have created what you’ve got–you have all the power to create what you DO like from here on out.

Easier said that done?  Absolutely.  Impossible?  Not at all.

I’ve just urged you to ask the question, “Why did I attract THIS?” for anything you encounter that is not the best possible thing.  (It’s a good idea to ask the question for those things you like, too, so you learn how to bring more of those into your life.)

And here’s another lesson in this seedy underbelly of the Law of Attraction: what about undesirable things that happen to other people who are in your life? Well, they are in your life, so you have attracted them, right? Parents, children, spouses, etc. So what happens to them is part of your life too.

Let’s say that your spouse contracts an illness. Did your spouse attract this illness?  Yes.  Did you attract this illness to your spouse?  No, BUT you attracted an ill spouse into your own life.

Aha!  Do you get that?  So the illness itself, as a THING, is serving multiple purposes for multiple people.

“Why would I attract THAT?”

GREAT QUESTION!  Please continue to ask it.

There can be any number of reasons why you would be served by your spouse’s illness, to wit, an opportunity to care for this person who has given you so much, proof to yourself that you are strong and capable in the way you deal with this, an urge to make changes in your life… the list of possibilities is endless.

If you are asking the question “Why did I attract THIS?”, and the answers are hard to find, a good psychic who understands the workings of the Universe and is also a medical intuitive (such as yours truly) will help you figure out just “Why did I attract THIS?”

I hope you’re hungry, because this is a lot of food for thought.

2012: Apocalypse or Genesis?

This seems to be on everyone’s lips – 2012, the end of the world!  People have been talking about it and speculating about it ever since someone mentioned that the ancient Mayan calendar ends then.

Poppycock.

I have been asked to serve on a panel of psychics to discuss the “fate of the world” with regard to 2012, and I thought this might be a good time to talk about it here.  (BTW, if you would like to hear that panel for free, it’s in Denver, at the Jefferson County Fairgrounds, Sunday, October 2, 2011, 1:00 to 3:30.)

You know that I am a philosopher more than a mathematician, so I’m not going to talk about the actual calendar (although I have studied it a bit, and it’s complex and not really scary), but I do want to talk about what’s going on with the world in general.

We have been entering a new age for quite a while.  Remember back in the ’80s when we talked about “New Age”?  Well, that’s because it is just that, a new age.  A new way of thinking and talking and feeling.  A new age of enlightenment and the re-emergence of the Divine Feminine.  A time of greater prosperity for all people.

2012 represents the true turning point, but energy and enlightenment have been speeding up for years, maybe decades.  You know all those “peace, love and understanding” people in the ’60s?  They were getting the ball rolling.  Remember “women’s lib”?  More people getting things to start the change.

And more recently, the stock market crash of 2008.  It affected the entire world economy.  And why?  Because there IS now a world economy.  No country stands alone any longer.  Even when Greece was crashing, it was only about 17th in world economies, but it had a massive effect on everyone else.

And that crash was part of the re-construction of many of the old ways and methods.  Old structures are breaking down so that new ones can replace them–better ones!

And this is what all of these things are about:  Welcome to the new age. 

There will not be a cataclysmic event; the world will not end.  Relax!  But get ready for many more things to change and to change quickly.  We are coming into a time when prosperity will be much more available to many more people. 

Is there a catch?  Yes.  If you dig in your heels and refuse to change what you’re doing, it will be harder for you.  Listen to what’s going on.  Listen to your heart, your inner guidance.  Notice how you feel when something happens.  Does this feel good or bad?  If you open your mind, does it feel better?

There is a lot of conflict around us, especially if you listen to the news.  Radical factions are hating on everyone.  Those are the ones who don’t want to change, even if it’s for the better.  Don’t worry about them.  They are also the ones who are resisting, so it’s harder for them.  Send them a blessing.

And finally, I will say this.  There is no gain without a loss.  There is no beginning without an ending.  So when it seems that something is collapsing, recognize that something is also being built.  And ask yourself if the new thing isn’t better than the old thing.

Enjoy the new age!  Enjoy 2012!  It’s going to be GOOD!

Don’t Force It–Pull

For those of you who are, like me, old enough to remember such things, there was a delightful little sitcom on TV in the ’70s, called “Laverne & Shirley”.  It spun off from another sitcom, “Happy Days”.  (While it may have been a while ago, my barely-grown daughters are familiar with both shows, so you probably are too.  But if not, you can always Google it.)

Laverne and Shirley were roommates and best friends, so in the pilot episode, they moved into their new basement apartment in Milwaukee.  A scene that sticks with me is where Laverne is trying to get her key out of the lock.  She’s tugging with all her might, pushing one foot against the door for leverage, but the key won’t budge.

The landlady stops by and Laverne complains, “I can’t the stupid key out of the lock!”  The landlady reaches for the key and pulls it out with ease. 

“How did you do that?” Laverne asks, incredulous.

“Don’t force it–pull,” replies the landlady quite simply.

Later, the scene is played out again with Shirley sliding out the key and telling Laverne, “Don’t force it–pull.”

I’ve thought about this a lot lately.  Not because I have so much time to think about 1970s sitcoms, but because any time I feel like I am not attracting, creating, or accomplishing what I really desire, this simple phrase pops into my head:  Don’t force it–pull.

Replace “pull” with “allow” or “receive” and you’ve got a powerful motto. 

Sometimes when I feel like I am working very hard to create or attract what I want, I get this message and I think, I have to walk away, let go of all this “action” and simply allow my desires to manifest. 

This is for you.

Shy Spirits

Just for fun, I thought I’d share something about working with spirits, or people on the Other Side. As a psychic medium, I have worked with my share of such energies. It’s fascinating work for me and is almost always very satisfying for the client.

When I am doing a psychic medium reading, we’ll hear from one or more of the client’s late loved ones about 50% of the time. The rest of the time, there are several reasons for not hearing from someone from the Other Side:

1) The client is too young to have lost anyone close to them or has simply not had that experience at any age.

2) The client is not interested in hearing from those on the Other Side. The spirits will accommodate that sometimes–but not always! Sometimes, they come on through anyway, and I convey their messages.

3) The client is already in touch with his or her late loved ones, being naturally in-tune with that, or having had such a close relationship that it continues beyond death.

4) Rarely, I’m not the right medium for that or those spirits. Sure, it can happen!

When I did group readings specifically to communicate with those on the Other Side, as John Edward does on television, there were always plenty of spirits to choose from. Some are more insistent than others, while some wait patiently and hope to have a turn.

I can’t speak for John, but usually when I am through working, either by the clock or my own fatigue, the spirits will leave me alone until I give them another opportunity.