Do you think the baby comes out of the womb asking, “Did I do all right? Do I get a good grade? Does my hair look good? Does my mom love me?” Of course not. Infants have just experienced nine months of having every need met instantaneously. It doesn’t occur to them that this trend won’t continue.
After being born, we know instinctively to cry when we have a need, and that need is usually met pretty quickly, since a baby crying is annoying and, to its mother, unbearable. We have come from unconditional love and we KNOW it, we have a full knowing of it, without doubt.
Then, one day, Mommy has to say “NO.” She has to stop you from touching the stove or pulling the TV over on your head. And that feels like NOT LOVE. So we start trying to please her in an effort to get back to LOVE, back to the Garden.
We start making our beds and good grades, singing if we can sing, being funny if we can be funny, smiling if we’re good at smiling. We seek approval because it’s the only thing we can figure out how to get. It only works sometimes, but it feels pretty good when we can get it.
And that’s the paradox: You can’t earn unconditional love. You can only earn approval, which is a pale shadow of unconditional love. But we keep trying, because in the back of our heart, we remember unconditional love and we want it. We want it bad.
Here’s the secret: You’re still in the Garden. You never really left; it’s an illusion that you have to earn someone’s approval. You are MADE of unconditional love! Your soul is a piece of it, and you carry it around in this vessel you call a body. All you have to do is REMEMBER and FEEL.
Can you feel it? Have you ever felt like you’re back in the Garden? Close your eyes and feel it. It is within you now and forever.