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Why I Work Differently from Other Psychics
Here’s something you may not know about the way I talk to dead people:
Have you ever watched a medium like John Edward, working in a group? He’ll say, “I’m getting someone in this area of the group [gesturing to a swath of the audience] who has a husband or brother who passed of a sudden impact, like a car wreck.” Even working one-to-one, most mediums will see who shows up and then you help to identify them.
I used to do that too, because I learned from watching John Edward, but I stopped doing that and started doing this instead:
I simply ask which of your late loved ones you are missing the most and for their name and relationship to you. Unlike many mediums, I don’t have any trouble calling someone up on the cosmic phone, “Hi, this is MoJo, Mary is here and would like to talk to Jim. Is he around?”
And here’s why I do it this way and it’s an important 3-part why:
For one thing, John Edward and others could possibly (I don’t think John does) use this method just to choose a person to read for. Like, maybe they don’t actually have anyone from the Other Side waiting in the wings, but they are just narrowing it down–someone in a hall of hundreds of people will have lost their husband or brother that way, right? It just seems a little disingenuous to me.
Before you start thinking I am a Doubting Debbie Downer, I could be wrong. It is definitely a possibility that John and others are simply going with the loudest spirit who’s hanging around, waiting to talk to their living loved ones. After all, when I used that method, that’s what I was doing, so who am I to judge?
Secondly, when I did it the “John Edward way,” sometimes a client would be disappointed not to hear from someone they were hoping for. One lady at a house party even got mad at me because she didn’t hear from who she wanted to and “didn’t like the ones who” she did hear from! (I thought that was hilarious, because she blithely ignored the fact that I was able to talk to dead people, which is kind of a rare gift, to say the least!)
And finally, it saves everyone a lot of time not having to wait to figure out who this person is on the Other Side. “Red hair? Who had red hair? Just that one little girl down the block when I was 5 years old. Is it that little girl?”
So that’s my MoJo Method and I’m stickin’ to it. If you come to a reading with me, expecting to wait to see who “shows up,” you‘ll be pleasantly surprised to hear from exactly who you wanted to hear from.
I’ve Been an Entrepreneur for 25 Years: Here Are Five MoJo Pro-Tips
Twenty-five years! I can’t believe it myself, but there it is: I started my first business, Corporate Habitat, June 1, 1999. What I have learned in all this time would fill a book, maybe a series of books, but here are a few nuggets that have served me well.
MoJo Pro-Tip #1: “You don’t need any of that, all you need is–.”
When I started my first business, I was of course very excited and I called my dad, who was self-employed most of his life. I told him, “I’m going to need a new computer, an email address, a designated phone line, plus one for faxes and internet (it was 1999), and business cards, probably letterhead—”
Daddy stopped me. “Wait, wait. You don’t need any of that. What you need is a client. Until you have a client, you don’t have a business.”
Ohhhh.
Daddy conceded that I probably needed business cards (again, it was 1999), but I could go down to Kwik Kopy (remember?) and get those pretty cheap.
I’ve never forgotten that little nugget. You can put all the window dressing on your business that you want, but until you have a client, ya ain’t got nothin’!
MoJo Pro-Tip #2: WFH Basics
Starting my first business out of my home in 1999, I was fresh out of corporate, and my clients were corporations, so I set some ground rules for myself based on my corporate experience. Even though many things about business, and my business in particular, have changed, I still stick to these for the most part.
- Set a schedule and stick to it. (Overtime notwithstanding.) Back in the day, I had school-aged children, so I got up about the same time I did when I had a job-job, got them off to school, and then went to my office. I usually knocked off about the time they came home from school, then headed back for a couple of hours after they went to bed at 8:00.
- Dress like you would if you were meeting people in person. Working in your pj’s is fun and comfy, but in the same way that a smile can be heard over the phone (I learned that in all that sales training I went through!), the way you feel about your appearance, as well as your competence, worthiness, and more, will come through in your voice, in your emails, and in your marketing copy.
- Don’t watch TV (movies, video games) during the work day.
- Designated a separate space, no matter how small, for your office. Don’t try to work at your kids’ homework table, the breakfast table, or where you pay the bills. You need a corner or a closet or some space to call your own, preferably with a door. (I have not had a door for almost my entire career as an entrepreneur, but I am about to get one and I could not be more thrilled.)
- And speaking of being alone while you work, get out of the house at least once a day. When I first started, part of my service was to visit job sites for my clients, so I had to get out. Later, when most of my clients met with me over the phone, I still made sure to get out and about, because stir-crazy is a thing.
- Find a way to socialize at least a little. During some of my slower times, the free networking group I attended (and led for two of the seven years I was there) every week was like church without the religion. The group became like family, and during both prosperous times and leaner times, that group was where I got the majority of my business.
- Give yourself comp time. In my first business, among other tasks, I managed large corporate moves. For the days of the move, we started Friday evening, worked all weekend, and then met the client’s employees at the new offices early Monday morning. It didn’t take me long to figure out that working a full week after that did not work! And I was still young! So if you have to work a late night or a weekend, if you run seminars or retreats, if you sell your wares at fairs, be sure you get some time off to recuperate.
- Don’t forage for food all day. This may not be an issue for you, and it wasn’t for me, as I don’t eat when I am not hungry, but if you tend to wander into the kitchen to graze if you are at home, set a plan for yourself to keep from overeating or eating too much junk food.
MoJo Pro-Tip #3: My Secret Shame
I hate to admit it: I have never been very good at “sales.” With my first business, I didn’t have to sell at all, because I was filling a niche that architects loved me for, and I was good at it, so architects (and many of my contractors) sent new business my way without my even have to ask.
But the truth is, from my first sale of a box of cookies as a Brownie Girl Scout, through leasing apartments, to selling office furniture… I confess, I’m not much good at it. (But I was really excited to sell that box of cookies!)
No, you can’t “fix” it for me. I have attended countless sales workshops and trainings and gobbled up a bunch of books on selling.
I understand all the concepts. I know the right words to say and all the types of “closes.” I know about “they don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” I know how to create a call to action.
But it doesn’t matter. People have never bought from me when I use those old-school, bro-biz methods.
So yeah, I’m not so proud of those long-ago jobs that made me feel like a failure. But I can set that aside, because I am proud of the way I talk to people, connecting with them like I like them—because I do.
You may have heard me say that my favorite thing in the whole tired world [sic] is sittin’ around and vistin’.
Well, when people sit and visit with me, they want to buy from me. Or they don’t. I make a client-friend or I make a friend-friend. I win either way–and so do my clients.
If you’re not great at sales, try this “relationship marketing” thing. And that brings us to
MoJo Pro-Tip #4: Networking
For some, it’s bliss, for others a necessary evil. But, as I mentioned in the “Secret Shame” section, it can be very effective for growing your biz. I happen to be an extrovert, which makes it easy for me to network, and I became really good at it when I was leading a large networking group in the early 2000s. I even taught a networking workshop! However, even introverts can become effective networkers.
The reason networking works is that we have entered into an era of marketing with divine feminine values. In other words, this ain’t your grandpa’s Rotary Club.
Networking now is about connection and community, business owners supporting one another through their personal relationships. If you can be a friend, you can use networking to build your business.
Now, some of the old “rules” still apply:
- Don’t come on strong, handing out metaphorical business cards before someone asks, expecting to receive referrals of perfect clients immediately.
- Yes, give referrals to get referrals, but at the same time, keep in mind that the people you give referrals to will probably not be the ones who give you referrals.
- The old 30-second elevator speech is still good to have in your pocket:
- Name
- Business name, if any
- What you do
- Who you serve
- And asking for referrals should be as specific as possible. We had a chiropractor show up one day who said, “I’m looking for anyone with a spine.” He got some chuckles but no referrals. Now, if he had said, “I have openings in my practice for women who have new babies three months old or less, and had a c-section,” people would have come up with someone. Because that kind of request will make you go, “Oh, my neighbor…!” or “Yes, my daughter-in-law!” True story.
MoJo Pro-Tip #5: Contractors
Note: Be sure to check your state’s hiring laws about the difference between a contractor and an employee. Many states have strict laws about what makes an employee, and you can get into big trouble for violating them.
VA’s (Virtual Assistants, ICYDK) to coaches, bringing a contractor onto your team can be priceless. You don’t have to “manage” a contractor at all. Depending on your relationship with them, they will likely do what they do with little input from you (after onboarding, of course), and/or tell you what you need to do.
For example, I hired business manager/coach/emotional support human Lindsey Lopez (https://VirtuallyLindsey.com) a while back to help me get organized and find focus for moving my business forward. It turned out that she knew everything about business that I didn’t know, and then some. Keep in mind, I have been self-employed now for 25 years and somehow, Lindsey knows much more, so that is saying a lot. She also knows the latest trends in business of all kinds, but it seems to me like she is a specialist in exactly what I do. She has become indispensable to me, so I keep her on retainer!
Now, every business owner comes to the point of “I can’t get bigger until I can hire help, but I can’t hire help until I get bigger.” But that’s why contractors are so helpful. You can hire someone for a project or a launch, to write content for you, or to teach you how to do things for yourself instead of adding an employee before you are ready.
Comment below: Which of these tips did you find helpful? If you have been in business awhile, what other good basics would you add to this list?
The Big Secret About Your Destiny That Nobody Ever Told You
You have a Destiny, a meant-to-be THING you are supposed to do in your life.
The essence of that Destiny is for you to
enjoy your life,
be happy,
have fun,
learn things that interest you,
become self-aware,
become other-aware,
have a good time,
connect with, love, and help others,
experience all the breadth and depth of emotion, and
enjoy being a spiritual being having a human experience.
But here’s the big secret about your Destiny that nobody’s ever told you:
You get to choose it.
It’s not some quixotic quest or cosmic crusade,
nor is it an undiscoverable mystery—
you get to choose from the gifts you were born with to create your own recipe for “Destiny Stew”.
You have gifts and talents that are intended to be used for two things:
To have fun and
To help others
Think of something you know you are good at, one of your natural gifts, like singing, being a good listener, or athletic ability.
Doesn’t it feel good to flex that gift, even if you are just singing in the shower?
You know why it feels good? So you’ll do it. See how that is a “meant-to-be” kind of thing?
Awareness of your talents can be a bit tricky to come by, because if something is easy for you, you may have the crazy idea that it’s easy for everyone. (That’s what I used to think.)
But it’s not. Your gifts are unique to you, and they present in the unique way that only you can express them. Sure, lots of people can sing, but nobody sings exactly like you do.
“Every talent fulfilled and used in service to others blesses both the server and the served.” ~~MoJo Medium
Here’s a template for your “Destiny Stew” recipe:
- Figure out what those gifts are.
- Choose your favorite/s.
- Decide how you want to use them.
- Put them to work in service to others (for moola or not).
- Enjoy!
Ta-daa! You’ll fulfill your Destiny—and love your life.
Pssst! Here’s another secret: Your Destiny may actually be in several parts. If you get tired or bored of your original Destiny Stew, you can make a new recipe and do it all again.
Don’t Look at Me – I’m Not “Pretty” Right Now
We all want to be happy, right? Of course. I have created my life and my work around the idea of happiness.
And happiness is “pretty”, it looks good, a smile “increases your face value”…
In a personality assessment I took as part of a job years ago, I was told that one of my highest values was “aesthetics”. In other words, it is very important to me for things—and for me—to be “pretty”.
A friend once told me that I like for everything to be “pretty”. That is literally the word she used. She said, “You want everything to be pretty. And you don’t like XYZ, because that’s not pretty.”
More recently, my therapist has helped me to understand that, because of my upbringing, I regard negative feelings as “ugly” and therefore unacceptable. Positive feelings are, conversely, “pretty”.
And I do love pretty things, which is part of why I am always dressed cute, with my hair and nails and makeup just so, and why I love clothes and interior design and movies with lush cinematography.
My husband is very intuitive about people, their personalities and their emotions. And he can peg me in my anger or sorrow or feelings of inadequacy every time.
Well, dang. Ya caught me.
And you know what?
I hate that.
I hate being transparent.
I hate not being able to control what you see about me.
I hate my own fear that, if there is something in my mind or heart that isn’t “pretty”, you might know it. And then you won’t like me.
Brilliant sociologist and thought-leader Brené Brown says that shame comes from the fear that, if someone knew or even suspected a “not-pretty” thing about you, you would not be allowed to belong. You would be rejected.
And community and connection are what we humans are all about. It is a biological fact that we need one another. Early humans rarely survived for long by themselves. Like wolves and apes, we instinctively crave communion with others of our kind.
And now I get to my own Ugly Truth, and if you reject me, I’m gonna have to figure out how to live with that:
I am not perfect. I am not always happy. I am not always pretty. My feelings are not always something I feel proud of. There are aspects of my life—what I do and have, or don’t do or have—that I feel shame about.
But here’s my big problem: it’s not only important to me personally that my life be pretty. My being happy—or “pretty”—is vital to my work, my mission in life, and what I believe and understand to be my destiny.
Specifically, how can I inspire you if I am not happy most of the time?
How can I serve you if I don’t have it all figured out?
How can I guide you to be happier if I am not utterly, perfectly, and “prettily” happy all the time?
Those are hard questions for me. Oh, sure, I know you’ll “forgive” me for having a negative thought. You’ll understand that I am not perfect—nobody is, right?
But it is so important to me to be such a shining, brilliant example of joy and beauty and how great life can be that I am loathe to let you know that there’s anything about me that isn’t “pretty”.
And honey, I gotta admit, there’s plenty.
- I struggle with my closest relationships and communication within them.
- I am still learning how to feel like I am acceptable (and how to function without loads of anxiety) as an ADHDer in a neurotypical world—the revelation of which I came to very late in life. And that is a whole other “not-pretty” thing in itself, which I will spare you right now.
- I worry about money. No, I don’t worry about how I’m going to eat, but I do worry about paying for things I want, and how I am going to take care of myself and others I love if I don’t make enough money. And there are many things and experiences that I want very dearly that I don’t have the money for today.
- I often feel like a failure in one or more areas of my life, sometimes in all of them.
- And, although I have worked hard to banish shame (because it tried to kill me!, but I will save that for another time), it still rears its ugly head from time to time. Like right now. I don’t know if I will ever be able to show this essay to anyone. At least not without enormous trepidation.
- Worst of all, I’m afraid that, if I don’t show up for you all rich and doing all the Richie Rich things, you won’t be inspired to make your life “pretty” too.
Go figure–even MoJo gets the blues.
P.S. Here’s a little disclaimer to wrap this up, lest you think I am on the verge of tears or worse:
- Much of my life experience has been and continues to be beyond pretty.
- I really do consciously manifest what I want, love, and enjoy.
- There are many aspects of my Self that I love and adore and feel confident about.
- I love and am loved by many beautiful people.
- I have had tons of experiences that have enriched my life and given me pleasure and happiness.
- I know, at least on a conscious level, that I do belong.
- I am very confident in Destiny and my place in the world, even though I can sometimes be shy about “letting my light shine”.
- I know in my heart that I am here to help a few or several or thousands of people to be and do and have “pretty” in their lives too.
- And, finally, I love that I have the privilege to do the work I do, even when I feel like I’m “not pretty right now”.
That Which You Did Unto the Least of These
A Homily by MoJo Medium
“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’
41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’
44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’
45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
46 “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”
(It’s that punishment part most people miss.)
I think of these verses often, when I hear so-called Christians refusing everything to people they deem unworthy. And most people are somewhat familiar with the “whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me” part.
And that’s good, but the haters don’t seem to remember or care that they should see every homeless person, every LGBTQ person, every poor person, every ill person, every prisoner, every person of a different faith or no faith, etc. as part of the body of their Christ.
And they also don’t seem to know that the ones who did refuse aid, service, and love to others? They were sent “away to eternal punishment”.
Whether you believe in hell or not (I don’t) is irrelevant. What matters is whether you care about other people, all of whom are connected to you energetically and spiritually.
If you are like me–not Christian and/or raised Christian but no longer practicing–this is a moral, spiritual, and/or practical issue for you, rather than one about the fear of damnation. Do you help others or not? Does it matter to you what happens to anyone else? Do you feel good when you help someone? I do.
Or, if you don’t claim to be Christian, or you don’t care about anybody else, then whatever. I can’t help you. Stingy guts.
But, if you do claim to be Christian and you not only neglect the needs of others but actively speak out (and vote) against them, then don’t make me come over there and slap you upside the head, which is better than you deserve.
Maybe you’re afraid of everything being taken away from you? Maybe you’re afraid of being forced to be someone you’re not? Well, welcome to the world. Try giving–as directed by Jesus–and see how much you receive in return.
Besides, you get to go to Heaven! Yay for you!
Thus ends today’s sermon.
Save this post! You might need to slap someone upside the head with it!