Pithy Quote 14

“God is in the ‘unknowing’. Be glad of what you don’t know,
because that is where God is, that is where the magic happens.

“It’s in the curiosity,
the study,
the research,
the search,
the wishing,
the motivation,
the impetus,
the desire to know
—-that is where creation occurs.”

A dear family friend passed away recently. He was the patriarch of a family that I grew up with, even though they lived in another state. The night before I was to leave town for his funeral, I asked him how he was doing in Heaven. He came forward willingly and we chatted a little. Then he gave me this quote. He stayed with me until I memorized it. Then I went to sleep.

In the morning, I wrote it down and posted it on Facebook. I sent it personally via text to a family member, who was moved to tears by it, because it meant something very personal to him. So I had to make a meme of it.

I hope you like it.

Hey, this “Vision Board” thing really works!

Vision Board January 2016You know about Vision Boards, right? I think they were more popular a few years ago than now, but they are still around. Featured in “The Secret” and about a gazillion teachers’ and gurus’ blogs, Vision Boards are a manifestation tool that simply put your dreams on paper, in visible form. Supposedly, doing this allows your dreams to manifest into reality. There are hundreds of stories of people’s visions coming to fruition, thanks to putting those visions onto boards.

Awhile back, I decided to create my annual Vision Board for New Year’s in a digital format. Instead of poster board and pictures and words cut from magazines, I designed a pretty version in Pic Monkey, an online photo-editing application. (www.picmonkey.com) Here is the second digital Vision Board I created, for 2016.

Then, in November, 2015, I had a new idea: Shrink that baby down to wallet size! I used a 3×5 index card (mine is unruled), created a little border, gave it a title, and proceeded to fill in all the words that described what I wanted out of that title. I admit, I am a Word Nerd, so this is really easy for me. You may need pictures–maybe you can draw little pictures on your Vision Card. (Here is more information about the Vision Card. It includes a story about a Vision Board I made that came true.)

And here is what is super-cool: They work! Apparevision cardsntly, when it comes to manifestation, size doesn’t matter! My fiance, Don, and I just moved. This move has been pretty different from what we had originally expected. We listed our condo for sale back in October or November, just before I created my “our home” Vision Card. I was already shopping online for houses in one of Houston’s suburbs, and I was getting great ideas about what I wanted when we moved. I got really specific about it on my Vision Card, titled “Our Home”.

Fast forward six months, and we have just moved into our new apartment. That’s right, not a house, as we expected. The buyers were in a hurry, so we didn’t have the time we needed to find a new house and get closed before they needed to take possession of the condo. We decided to rent an apartment for six months and then buy a house. Well. Here we are. We found an apartment that we love. Both of us are just crazy about it!

And here’s the Big Happy: Almost everything on that Vision Card is a part of this new home. The few things that are missing we don’t miss too much–and we can save those for the next home. We are already talking about staying here longer than our one-year lease. Yes, it’s that good.

I know you are ready to run right out and make up your own Vision Cards. Happy Visioning!

 

Destiny vs. Free Will (Part 12)

Ricci go w-“We are not permitted to choose the frame of our destiny. But what we put into it is ours.”~~Dag Hammarskjold

[Don’t go looking for parts 1-11, because I just made up “Part 12”. This is a topic I think about a lot and there may be other posts about it.]

I ran across this quote from the UN Secretary-General of the ’50s, and it made me start ruminatin’ yet again about destiny vs. free will. This is not a religious question for me, but a philosophical one: Is it all preordained or do we have a choice about our lives? If it is not preordained, how can I see events that will happen in the future? And, for people who are not psychic, is the question less–or more–important or difficult? And lastly, what did Dag know that the rest of us don’t?

I have meditated, read, and thought quite a bit about this. I was raised Presbyterian, where preordination is the prescribed belief. God plans it all out for us, according to the Presbys. Even though I left the church long ago and am not religious, this belief informs my thoughts and feelings today.

I have read other teachers’ works which claim that our souls plan everything ahead of time, before we are even conceived. I find that can be comforting, especially in difficulty. To believe that you had a good reason for planning whatever tragedy has befallen you can be somewhat soothing. But then I think, isn’t that the same thing as saying, “It’s God’s will”? And “It’s God’s will” always pisses me off, because why would God want you to suffer? One reason I am not religious is that I don’t believe in a God who allows, wants, or causes suffering.

But if you have chosen your path yourself, and you assume you had a good reason, does that help? “Why in the world would I want to lose [this person I love] at this stage in my life?” And we don’t know.

The other side of this coin is that everything may be random. Stuff just happens, and you can make things happen or not happen if you think and try and plan and work hard enough. It’s “free will”–another religious thing I don’t like, as if we are actually programmed one way, but then “God” gives us freedom from that programming so we can be free to sin and screw up for Him. Pfffft.

After working with clients for over ten years, and making accurate predictions for them all, one day I finally determined that our lives are a combination of Destiny and Free Will. It seems that there are events I call “Destiny Points” that will happen no matter what you do. Examples are the person you’ll marry and the children you will (or won’t) have, a car wreck, a job or career, that kind of thing. The choice part comes in how fast or slow you get to those points (unless they are tied to a specific age, which seems possible) and how happy you are getting there.

This worked for me pretty well. But I kept coming back to the idea of, if I can predict it accurately, doesn’t that mean it is already in motion? Already a plan? Already happening in a future time? And I predict all manner of random things, not only big “Destiny Points”, that turn out to be true. I’ve had premonitions of things that were not connected to readings or clients, such as my husband’s death and September 11–how is that possible, if they were not already going to happen?

My theory that we have Destiny Points and our choice of happiness and speed between them matches Hammarskjold’s quote fairly well. What do you think?

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Pithy Quotes 13: Disapproval

disapprovalReceived from one of my very own RIPs:

“Someone else’s disapproval of you is their fault, not yours.”

Other people were not put on this earth to give or withhold their approval of you. And you were not put here to earn their approval. Anyone who doesn’t “approve” of you in any way is only showing their own colors, drab and ugly as they may be.

It can be hard to ignore someone’s disapproval, especially those closest to you. Oh, sure, it’s pretty easy not to care if a stranger looks askance at your tattoo or outright tells you she disapproves of what you just said to your child. Those fall into the “joke ’em if they can’t take a f**k” category. Roll your eyes and move along.

But when it’s your family members or other close loved ones, disapproval can sting. Still, it comes down to this: no matter how much you might desire your loved one’s approval, that approval (or disapproval) has nothing to do with you. It is only that person trying to manipulate you into making him/herself feel better. (And they don’t know that their happiness is up to them, not you! Go figure!)

And who wants to be manipulated into doing someone else’s bidding? Show of hands? None? How about that?

I can’t even count the number of times I have described the third chakra to a client in these words: “Your opinion of you is the only one that needs to matter to you.”

You may never get the approval you so dearly long for from your dad, your mom, your grandma… But it doesn’t matter, because their disapproval is their own fault. They conjured it up and spit it out as they chose to do. Go on and do your thing, baby. Not that you need it, but you’ve got my approval.

Vision Cards – Like Vision Boards, But Portable!

vision cardsWhere do I get these amazingly wonderful ideas? From my angels, of course! You probably get them too, right?

Here is my latest-and-greatest angel/guide download, and I am having a great time with it.

Vision boards became popular several years ago with the rise in interest in the Law of Attraction. By creating a poster with things that you want on it, you draw those things into your life. There are lots of great stories about how effective vision boards can be. I have made a number of them over the years, when I was feeling extra-creative (like I am now–what is up with that?).

During one of my numerous moves over recent years, I ran across a travel-themed vision board I had made. When I made it, I didn’t have any plans (or money) for any travel, and I put places on my vision board that I didn’t even have much great desire to go, such as New York City and Paris. They were just popular travel spots that I thought I “should” visit. When I unearthed the travel vision board, I discovered that I had indeed visited a number of the places on it, including New York City and Paris! And most of those trips came to be via something other than me having the money to do it. They were gifts and special offers.

Vision Board January 2015 - CopyBack in January of this year, I created a vision board for 2015, but I did it in a photo editing software. (www.picmonkey.com) Working in this medium can feel less creative to people who prefer working with their hands, but it was very satisfying for me. Here’s the result.

Without digging any further into the phenomenon of vision boards, I offer this simple suggestion: shrink it down. The nice thing about vision cards, such as the ones I created, shown in the picture above, is that you can carry them in your wallet or purse, you can put them under your pillow, you can stick them in a little box or book. Vision boards tend to be bulky, and vision cards are completely portable. That way, you can refer to them any time you want, and storage is simple.

I envision a world where everyone creates vision cards to make their lives better! And we put them into photo albums, which we stuff onto our bookshelves, where we can go back and look at them any time we like! And we’ll say, “Oh, look what I created! I brought that happy thing into being!”

Happy visioning!

Whence Cometh Our Pain

your jobEver been attacked? Bullied? Cyber-picked-on? Outright screamed at?

I recently got verbally crucified by a life-long friend. (And I rather doubt the friendship can survive.) For some reason, she posted a diatribe about what a terrible person I was as a comment on a Facebook post of mine. I don’t know what triggered her revelation of her apparently-long-held anger, but she let me have it. Hard. And it hurt.

I removed the post from Facebook and messaged her privately, apologizing for her pain and my contribution to it–which was, of course, innocent. I would never cause her pain on purpose. But I did so accidentally. And she turned it around, years later, to hurt me back.

My many apologies seemed to soften her anger slightly, but she did not forgive me. And she repeatedly described her own pain and anguish, of which I had been a part. She did not acknowledge my own horrific pain at the same time, nor do I think she is aware of it even now. And that makes me think she does not care.

Being excluded, ignored, or treated with apathy may be some of the worst pain in the world, especially when you are suffering from some of life’s hardest blows. Apathy serves to add insult to injury. But I did not defend myself to my friend, I only acknowledged her feelings and apologized again.

Now, this lady is by nature very sweet, one of the nicest people I have ever known. Her unkind behavior and downright cruelty toward me were extremely out of character. I believe that she has been “tutored” by someone to be angry with me. I only hold her accountable for being so ugly to me with absolutely no consideration for where I was coming from.

My response to her was to apologize repeatedly and to make mention of all of us having pain. She didn’t know, probably still does not know, how deeply she hurt me with her harsh words, words that accused me of being just an asshole, someone who doesn’t care at all, or even someone who would hurt another person on purpose.

As I am processing this incident–and it knocked me for a loop–I wrote up a little something on Facebook that I’d like to share with you here. It is for those who have been hurt, but it is also for those who do the hurting, intentional or not. And we all have been both.

Before you accuse someone, before you lash out in anger, before you even have a bad thought about someone, please try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Most people are not trying to hurt or offend you. Most of us are doing the best we can to get through every moment. Life isn’t always easy, but love is what makes it worth it.

Here’s my note:

Have compassion.

Show some compassion today. Not just to one person, but to everyone.

Assume positive intent. Not everyone is being rude or mean on purpose.

Include the person who never goes. Maybe you’ve left her out, thinking she’s shy. Maybe she’s depressed. Maybe including her will do her a world of good that you can’t imagine. Maybe excluding her–again–will hurt her more deeply than you’ll ever know.

Some people get depressed and get treatment for it. Some don’t.
Many people who seek treatment for depression take a long time–years even–to get the right balance of treatment for them to feel okay.

Sometimes a depressed person seems grumpy, because that’s the best she can do to keep from crying in front of you. Or all the time. Sometimes “grumpy” is her M.O., because that’s how she manages to show up for work and tries to get through the day. Maybe it is taking every ounce of courage and energy she has just to get out of bed.

Be kind to someone who is poor. Being poor is not necessarily a reflection on how hard a person works or how willing a person is to work. You know the old saying, “If wealth were the inevitable result of hard work, every woman in Africa would be a millionaire.” And so would I.

There is no excuse for showing contempt for someone simply because he is poor. He’s not poor because he wants to be, or because he is trying to cause an affront to you. Nobody enjoys being poor, believe me.

Call your friend who has lost a loved one within the last year or two. Let them know you’re thinking about them and that you care. Grief is a pain that lessens over time but never goes away.

Have compassion today. Show compassion every day.